Tiffany claims that they break up taught her some important lessons that will help her future relationships. Speaking of Tiffany's future relationships, when do we get to season 2? I want the Jake episodes!
Tony wants to know what the important lesson was. Tiffany explains that Kevin couldn't swim, so now she only wants to date surfers. Right on cue, Sly comes in with a surfboard. Or, I should say, he TRIED to come in with a surfboard. He actually ran into the door while holding the surfboard. Once he makes it into Sharkey's, he ends up running into several people and nearly knocking them over with the board.
Like, McKayla Maroney, Tiffany is not impressed.
Tony explains that Sly doesn't actually like surfing, he just likes surfer girls. Since they'd rather drown him than date him, his plan is to pretend to be a surfer.
At the next table, Sly is flirting with a group of girls. He asks them "who wants to make some waves with Uncle Sly?" One of the girls says "wipe out!" and they all dump their water on him. An extra in the background makes a big deal out of laughing.
Tiffany tells Sly that surfing is serious business and he shouldn't exploit it. Sly insists that he's not exploiting it. He's using it for his own personal gain! Tiffany offers him some surfing pointers.
Back at the garage, Tony and Matt show Jenny an ad for the "Garage Band Lighting System" Apparently it's going to "blow away the competition with a pulsating extravaganza of color" It sounds a lot like the fireworks that my aunt buys every 4th of July.
Turns out, it costs $300. This will not end well.
Matt suggests asking their mother to hire them to do some work upstairs. Jenny points out that this is counterproductive because then Mrs. Garrison would have to hire someone to do it right.
Mrs. Garrison comes into the garage. Matt asks if they can paint the upstairs. "We'll do it for only $300!" Mrs Garrison says no pretty quickly. Jenny points out that some cultures eat their first born. o_O
Matt begs Mrs. Garrison some more. She's basically like "nice guilt trip, kid!" and they get the job. Matt asks to be paid in advance, and Mrs. Garrison agrees.
Everyone cheers. Then Sly and Tiffany come in after Sly's surfing lesson. They had a great time on the waves, and Tiffany tells Sly that he's a natural. Jenny tells them that she, Tony and Matt will paint the room so the surfers can have more time on the waves.
Later, the gang is at Sharkey's. Tiffany and Sly join them. The others notice that Sly and Tiffany seem to be getting along well lately. (Tiffany even gave Sly a surfer nickname - Splashy Nose or something equally silly/ridiculous.
Sly tells them that he and Tiffany are going to the movies together later that night.
Jenny tells Tiffany that she's nuts. Tiffany says that no, she's not nuts. Sly wants to be loved, and frolick in the waves like a happy porpoise. No, she really said that I think I agree with Jenny. Tiffany is nuts.
Later, at the movies, Tiffany and Sly keep sneaking glances at each other. The movie ends, the lights come up, and Sly wipes away a tear. Tiffany catches him. Sly says that he's not crying about the movie; he's upset about paying $7.50 for "this garbage"! Aww, remember when movies were cheap? I remember paying $7.50 in the mid-nineties. I think it was $4.50 for a matinee back then. I can't remember what I paid last time I went to the movies. I think it was over $11.
Tiffany tells Sly that she thinks it's beautiful when a man cries. Sly tells her that he's glad she didn't see him when he watched Bambi. Then this happens:
Then they have a conversation that mimics the last line of the movie they just watched. They kiss, and the camera pans over to the gang watching in disgust.
The next day at Sharkey's, Tony and Matt join Sly, and ask him where Tiffany is. He tells them that she's out "checking on the surf" and that he misses her. Tony and Matt congratulate Sly on his newfound happiness.
Just then, a girl comes over and tells Sly that his surfing impressed her and she wants him to join her for a couple waves. He perks up for a second, then turns her down.
The girl leaves, and Sly turns back to the guys to talk about Tiffany some more. Then another girl comes over to ask Sly to boogie with her, using the extra boogie board. He turns her down too.
Yet another girl comes over and asks Sly to help her rub on some tanning lotion. He looks at Matt who shakes his head. Sly pouts and asks "just the shoulders?"
They girl offers to help him. She grabs his hand and puts it on her shoulder. Sly says "I can't" The girl says "Your loss!" "I know" Sly whimpers.
Sly realizes that he misses chasing girls and decides that he needs to break up with Tiffany.
Back at the Garrison house, Matt and Jenny have begun the painting session. They complain that Tony hasn't done anything yet. Sly comes in and they ask him if he broke up with Tiffany yet. He confesses that he doesn't know how to dump a girl. Tony points out that it's because Sly is usually the one getting dumped. Sly decides that he's going to find a way to get Tiffany to dump him. Jenny tells him not to play games with her. Sly says that he's going to give Tiffany a list of rules to follow if she wants to keep dating him. I don't see this ending well either.
Sly decides to test the rules out on Jenny. After each one, she rolls paint onto him.
After Sly leaves, Tony, Jenny and Matt end up having a paint fight. Dennis (I feel like we haven't seen him for a while!) comes in and tells them that Mrs. Garrison wants them to quit it. They all surround Dennis and include him in the paint fight.
Back at Sharkey's, Sly gives Tiffany the list of rules. She says that she'd love to commit to his rules. Sly is quickly realizing that his plan isn't going the way he'd hoped. Tiffany says that it's important to state your needs upfront. In fact, she's going to make a list of her own! After they compare lists, they'll celebrate their love with a "Soul Swapping Surfer Ceremony" She explains that it's the customary way for Pacific Coast surfers to seal their eternal love.
Tiffany comes into the garage and Sly is there. She acts surprised to see him at rehearsal. (why wouldn't he be there?) He lies that he couldn't stand to be apart from her. He tells her that he wants to talk to her about the ceremony, and she says that it can wait because she wants to sing him a song.
She sings "Let Me Be the One" which I don't remember hearing more than once on the show. I know there were a handful of repeats, but I think this is the only time that this song came up, which is fine, because it's, um, not very good.
After the song, everyone cheers. Tiffany asks what Sly wanted to say about the ceremony. He chickens out and tells her that he can't wait. They run off to talk about the arrangements.
Just then, Dennis comes into the garage to tell them that they have mail. It's their new lighting system! They run into the kitchen to check it out. Dennis tells Matt that he tipped the delivery man and wants to be reimbursed. Matt tells him that it was nice of him, and hands him the money. Matt leaves. Dennis giggles and says "Sucker!"
Matt, Tony and Jenny go into the kitchen to open their package, and Matt pulls out.... a flashlight. Tony wants to know what's up with the "bubble gum boy scout flashlight"
Matt says that they'll return it. Jenny points out that it's non-refundable and complains that they got ripped off. Matt says that the box includes colored gels, He realizes that they did, indeed, get ripped off.
Mrs. Garrison comes into the kitchen to say that the upstairs room looks like a Guns and Roses motel room. Jenny apologizes and says that they threw in the towel. Mrs. Garrison asks for her money back. Matt explains that they already spent it on the lighting system. Mrs. Garrison says that she'll confiscate it until they pay her back. Oh well!
Next up is the Surfer Ceremony thing and it's ridiculous and I'm tired and can't recap it. Let's just say that it involves a lot of surfers hanging around Sharkey's, throwing around words like "Gnarly" and trumpeting out of conch shells. Matt strums his guitar and sings softly. The surfer dudes do the wave.
 |
| the guy in the middle is the Great Surfer Guru. No, I'm serious |
When the Surfer Guru tells them that the ceremony means they can't "scope other Betties and Tommies" Tiffany realizes that she wants to be free to date other people. They Sly gets all upset about it even though he's the one who wanted to break up with her.
The Guru dismisses everyone to go out and surf.
Two girls come up to Sly and ask him to join them out on the waves. He realizes that he'll be okay after all.
aaaaaand.... SCENE. Man, this episode was a weird one. No wonder it took me a week to finish,
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